Right now I'm reflecting and grieving with hurting loved ones of mine today. A status on facebook reveals that a family whom we revere is suffering the loss of a baby due to miscarriage after years of trying to conceive again. It reminds me of how many more out there are dealing daily with the inability to conceive today -again or for the very first time? I know of at least two more.
A call came yesterday with news of a postponed wedding... just two and a half weeks before the big day. Regardless if it was the right thing to do or not, it was still a heart wrenching decision to make. So many dreams of white dresses, tulle and flowers just so, and pews full of those you cherish... must wait for another day. I'm so proud of her for being obedient to the counsel she's known her whole life but mourning with her as she waits for another day... or possibly not.
Pets are pets. Whoa, not true. Every family with a pet has a different degree of intimacy or communion with its animal. For example, some are farm dogs that have slept on the porch their whole lives while others are sleeping in beds... with you. Today my aunt is putting her old faithful companion to sleep. He doesn't sleep in her bed, but he does sleep in her room. She is a single woman, and this dog she rescued from the pound has been there for her through thick and thin... cancer, heartbreaks, the loss of her mother, retirement, and an 800 mile move across the Heartland. He was a service dog that brought joy to those in hospitals and rehab centers over the years, and he's been a constant friend for my aunt. Her heart is breaking today.
Sometimes life changes in a day. Sometimes we are given the chance to be obedient and make the hard, right choice, and sometimes we have no choice and it all seems so unfair.
Other times, life changes in a day and it's not quite so sudden. We have time on our side...time to plan and time to adjust. Retirement days are counted down and finally arrive, babies are conceived and soon are born healthy and usually not a day too soon... at least that's how I felt about pregnancy. And big questions are popped and vows are eventually exchanged.... even if it takes 20 years to see it through. Haha! I waited almost 20 years for that particular wedding last weekend. And sometimes it's illness lingering and finally a passing from this life.
Next month I go back into the classroom after 14 years of being home with my girls. I guess, in a way, I'm following them to school... I will have two of my three daughters in class with me throughout every school day. After enrolling Rosalind and Rayne in Christian education, the school called an asked me to consider coming to teach for a year due to its growing pains its feeling because of a recent growth spurt. These truly are exciting times for this school with another satellite school established this year and more teachers being added at the parent school. It's not what I had envisioned myself doing, but I know it's part of the plan. My heart desires to be in the upper grades, but I see the benefit of beginning again at a lower age level. It's where I've been for the past several years in Awana and Sunday school, and at home with my own children. I know these kids. (demographically, not personally) And that familiarity will be such an asset as I settle into teaching again.
